aaa....e-errr.....hmmmm....

i ran through my collection of pictures....

all of it...since the day i started to collect them....

of all those albums...i realise something....

I.DO.NOT.HAVE.ANY.PIC.OF.MY.SORROWFUL.MOMENTS.

n it let me into a deep thinking...

did we take picture juz to capture only those happy moments of ours?

did we take a picture juz to show how happy we are?

OR,did we take a picture...

with so many things running wild inside our head,

with so much burden that people didn't see,

with so much weight that pressure our chest,

and with so much tears that waiting to break,

but decide,it is best if we hide it,

with juz a little curve upright on our lips.

"of course dude,thats why we are taking picture..to capture all our sweet memory.."

"do you think people would want to let others see their sore eyes and red nose??"

"duh,picture is suppose to give happiness whan we look at it.."

thats what you guys might be thinking of right now....

yeah,picture suppose to bear our sweet moment,to remind us of those moments later in our golden days...

but i do think,sometimes we need a proof of hardship that we've been through...

and in this case,i do not imply that we SHOULD take a pic when we cry....

instead,whenever we came through them,we take a  pic of it so that we still remember the feelings being in those situation...

honestly...i do think i have some pic of when i was going through them also but i cant find it...

coz im afraid,i'll be too engross in those happiness till i will be misslead by it...

trust me,i've been in this situation for so many times....

and i think,once again...i am in the way to be misslead...

i always been given the same first impression...

"at the first look,you look like a snobbish girl.giving a cold expression like that and i'm scared of you"

-thats normal,people...-

"when we started to talk to each other...'wow',i think...you are not that bad...instead you are so cheerful,so funny n quite a prankster too..."

-again,there is nothing new in that-

people think im cold,n then when we started to talk we actually can click together....

and sometimes,they said that i wasnt unhappy with my life,seems like i juz follow the flow of my life and accept all things juz like that...

well,people....do i have to show it to you when i'm crying my heart out??

duh.think about it will you...nobody like anyone see them when they are crying....

and sure...i am the type who hide everything with a smile...(yet they called me snobbish..isk3)

there is times i want to be someone else,to be in someone life but not me,so that i could see how people think about me...

but then,it is too much work then..to be,to act like someone else...

i can bet my life on this,only a few people that have seen my tears,as in i am really crying when the burden is too much for me....and that few people is less then 10...and they are the one i trust to witness when i am in my darkest state...

so people,if you had see me shed my tears in front of you,without hiding it,then you are my truly friend...

be proud of it,as it is hard to gain my trust...

till i have the guts to shed tears again,anyyeong....